The Coffee Flow Chart

May 22, 2012

By Lila Wallrich

Coal fueled the Industrial Revolution. Gasoline brought us Globalism. But at Wallrich Landi, our infernal idea contraption runs on a fuel no less powerful or astonishing: Coffee.

In the morning, the first team member to arrive proceeds directly to Big Bertha, the titanic 40-cup steel urn from which all energy flows, and flicks the orange power switch to ON. Soon the demonic beast awakes heaving, chugging and snorting steam angrily. But this refining process takes time. For the next 15 to 20 minutes, coworkers languish in wait for their first serving. Some huddle together for warmth and emotional support. Others just sit before the urn with plaintive puppy dog eyes, with their empty coffee cups queued up on the counter like jet liners waiting for takeoff.

Eventually, the “ready” light flickers on and is met with much rejoicing, and occasionally a bouncy jig.

For a few sweet hours, our cups runneth over. Caffeinated goodness issues forth at a flow rate that would impress BP executives. Company productivity trends sharply upward. But sometimes, when the pressure is on, our supply exhausts itself before the end of the work day. The staff emits a collective gasp.

That is usually when longing glances are cast upon the backup generator: our espresso machine. It produces a fine concentrated brew, but when people are facing extreme fatigue and a hundred unread emails, the brewing process can seem intimidating, which is why we developed this helpful flow chart.

The Coffee Flow Chart

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