Wallrich HQ is located in a building that’s still evolving. Last week, it grew a fitness room, which is pretty awesome. I needed this. Gym memberships are to me what rehab is to Lindsey Lohan: a fast track from good intentions to falling off the stair-wagon. It usually goes like this:

Phase 1: We Sign the Papers
Man, I don’t know how I got so sedentary, but I’m over it. I’m here to kick sedentary’s ass. I’ve brought new shoes and a water bottle made from the latest in water bottle material science. I can see the healthier me already, squinting into that mirror over there. I write my bank routing number on the form and purposefully sign my name as if I were ratifying an amendment to the constitution.

Phase 2: The Honeymoon
Five pounds in ten days. Booya! I’m gonna be rockin’ a six-pack by summertime.

Phase 3: The Zone
I missed yesterday, but I’ll hit it twice as hard tomorrow. Excelsior!

Phase 4: Life Gets a Little Crazy
Let me just get past this damn artificial construct, and I’ll get back to my routine.

Phase 5: You Deserve a Break Today
After that difficult experience, I need a vacation. I’ll get back to the “routine” soon enough—gradually, to avoid the bends.

Phase 6: Denial Isn’t Just a Rivulet of Sweat in Africa
I should go. I’ll go.

Phase 7: The Surrender
I hereby acknowledge that I’ve been throwing my money away each month, and at this point, I’d just like that to stop, please.

But this time it’s different. Not only has life put a free, fully-functioning locker and gym just two floors down, but it has spawned a friendly Wallrich Fitness Challenge competition. We randomly grouped people into three teams and the team that spends the most time in exercise wins a bunch of swag and bragging rights.

The teams are as follows.

Team One
Frances
Jeremy
Maureen
Wendy
Lindsey
Joe

Team AWESOME
Eihab
Steve
Cheryl
Vickie
Chad
Chris

Gym Neighbors
Aaron
Jessica
Hannah
Marisa
Lila
Brian

As of Day Ten, Team One has taken the lead, but Team AWESOME and Gym Neighbors are nearly tied for a close second. With two weeks left, it’s still anybody’s Fitness Challenge. Let’s get sweaty!